Letting Go

Not long ago I had a dream I was driving too fast down a rainy slippery road.  The minute I thought about slowing down, I lost control of my truck.  Suddenly, I went sailing off the edge of a mountain like a bird in flight.  

In another dream, I was on my way to work when I took a wrong turn.  I was wandering around down a neighborhood as if I was in a foreign land.  Somehow I ended up standing on an empty beach.  Within moments, a tidal wave was rushing towards me like a tsunami. Before I knew it, the gigantic wave was hovering over my head ready to wash me away. 

Both dreams were frightening and so real like.  They made me nearly jump out of my bed.  What I remember most from these dreams was a feeling of inner peace.  The feeling was a calm one with a sense of letting go, not really giving up, but just realizing that life really was out of my hands and out of my control. In those final moments of the dream,  I had complete trust in God. I felt freedom from the pressures of the world.

For many years I have seen lives destroyed because of drugs, alcohol, and other addictions. Like a monster, these addictions have kidnapped many of my family and friends.  One by one, this monster has eaten away at their hearts, dragged their mind into hell, and placed them in a bondage nearly impossible to escape from.  Their lives became so tangled up with the brokenness as if they were trapped in a briar patch.  The lies, deceit, anger, robbery, sadness, and hopelessness became the thorns.

As the devastation of lives unfold before my eyes, my heart aches knowing there is little I can do to free them from this monster.  The more I pray, the more the destruction seems to grow.  For a while I thought what was the point of praying for them.  I use to believe that if I just loved them enough then things would eventually change, as if I had that type of control.  

Accepting that I can't help those close to me is very hard.  I want to run in, rescue, and have them feel no pain. Many times we do it with our children.  They climb, get into things, and fall.  They feel the pain.  As parents, we can guide and provide protection but there also has to be consequences from mistakes. We can allow our children to learn from the bad choices they make. 

Recalling these dreams made me realize that my prayers were not the only answer. I needed to learn to let go, trust, and look at my own issues of control.  None of us are perfect.  We all make mistakes.  They key is learning from them enough to make better choices next time.

Years ago a friend of mine gave me this "letting go" piece .  The words did not hit home until recently.  

Letting Go

To Let Go does not mean to stop caring, it means I can't do it for someone else.

To Let Go is not to cut myself off; it's the realization that I can't control another.

To Let Go is not to enable but to allow learning from natural consequences.

To Let Go is to admit powerlessness which means the outcome is not in my hands.

To Let Go is not to try to change or blame another, it is to make the most of myself.

To Let Go is not to care for but to care about.

To Let Go is not to fix but to be supportive.  It is not to judge but to allow another to be a human being.

To Let Go is not to be in the middle, arranging all the outcomes but to allow others to affect their destinies.

To Let Go is not to be protective, it is to permit another to face reality.

To Let Go is not to deny but to accept. It is not to nag, scold or argue but instead search out my own weaknesses and correct them.

To Let Go is not to criticize and regulate anyone but to become what I dream I can be.

To Let Go is not to regret that past but to grow and live for the future.

To Let Go is to fear less and love more.

Letting go allows us to trust God to do what we can't do -- provide the everlasting love, acceptance, and protection at all times.