My stomach ached with fear and anxiety. I dreaded to start the day as I was tired from a restless night full of worry and crying. This was to be a new year filled with joy, excitement, and new goals. Yet I would have rather been swept away with the old year like a memory pushed under the rug. The year started off in a negative light - I had lost my dad, my ex had moved out, and my close friend and co-worker was leaving. Everyone seemed to be disappearing right in front me as I struggled to cling onto them. Many times getting out of bed was such a fight. The only positive I saw was the weight loss from my lack of appetite with all of my anxiety and depression. This was me at the beginning of last year.
Change. Does anyone really like change, other than that clinging sound of the stuff in your pocket yearning for the vending machine? Negative change never fails to come right when life is going so great then suddenly life turns upside down. You lose a job, or a spouse, a loved one, something close to you, or your car unexpectedly breaks down. Perhaps the situation can be even more extreme such as losing a home to a tragedy like the big "F"s -- fire, flood, or foreclosure.
Even positive changes can be scary like getting a new job, a baby, or a new home. We wrestle with the idea of making the right decisions. Should I take this route? Maybe we feel failure, rejection, or that something bad will happen if we do a "different" thing. We stick to the same routine as we know what to expect. However, sometimes the very goal or passion we yearn for in life can be the very thing we keep running from.
Change is unavoidable. Whatever the case, life changes, whether they are good or bad, can be very scary. Is there a change in your life that NEEDS to happen yet you are too afraid?
That impending fear of going down a different new path of life keeps us circling around in a dirty pond with no room for growth. Imagine if we never conquered our fear of change - stuck crawling instead of walking, stuck in the same rut of life with the same routine. Step out Faith.
God asks us to trust Him, step out in faith, knowing that whatever choice we make, He will always be there to protect us. We can rest in peace knowing that when God throws unexpected changes in our lives, He wants the change to be for the good in our lives, to bring out the best in us. As Romans 8:28 states"...we know that in ALL things God works for the good of those who love him." After all, He knows what is best for us even when we think we know it ALL.
Take a new route in life. God has exciting adventure waiting for you.
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