Heartbreak

Remembering a Great Friend - Thad Tranbarger
On Friday morning (4/15/11) I received the shocking news that my good friend & co-worker, Thad Tranbarger had passed away from a massive heart attack the night before.  For a moment I thought it was a joke as Thad always brought his goofiness and laughter to work. I was devastated and heart broken when I realized the truth. We had worked together for 7 years.  What's weird is that we were just goofing off the day before and he seemed just fine. He was only 47 years old and had gotten back on track of eating healthy.  How could this happen? I was and am still in a bit of a shock.

I remember that Thursday I asked his advice (as usual) on my degree plans.  His advice was to get a degree in what I loved the most regardless of the pay.  He said he wanted to be a chef! He always encouraged me to go for what I loved the most no matter what - to live life to the fullest; to never regret and take time to really enjoy life. Even though I never met his wife, he had such joy when he talked about their relationship.  I admired that they did so many things together. He provided her with so much support and loved spending time with his granddaughters. I can't imagine their little hearts breaking.



Thad's joke backfired on him on this day! LOL



Going through this loss reminds me of a little of losing my Grandma Jean and Dad all over again.  Thad had a quality similar to theirs.  He brought sunshine and laughter into our office and always had a positive outlook about life. Thad was like having a big brother at work. He loved to joke around but help people out at the same time.

Coming to work, a strange emptiness surrounds us now.  You struggle to be strong and deal with the pain, to move on. But we are not robots and we have emotions.  For some, it's easy to share feelings while others tuck their emotions away to hid the pain, to be stronger.  For me, remembering his joy and his laughter helps ease the pain.



This was our nut ball - Thad!
He would kill me for posting this!



This is life....full of new beginnings and losses.  What I hope to learn from this loss is to not be afraid of Life or Death. To take Thad's advice and live life - to enjoy every moment, every person, every pain, every joy, and yes, even sorrow, for God has the Plan, not us. All He asks is for us to Trust and Believe in Him and His Plan.

Enjoy this Moment as if it were your last....

We Love & Miss You, Thad. PCS will never ever be the same :^(

Determined to be Positive by Giving Back

I have a close friend who has been enduring breast cancer for the last year.  I’ve seen her strength from within as she struggles with a new body image and the side effects of the chemo treatment pills.  The chemo pills can be like an evil friend.  They are the magic beans that help her body fight off the cancer cells but they also drag her down.  Every day she tolerates the sickness from the chemo.  What amazes me more is that the breast cancer is just another battle to her as she has fought many in her lifetime.  I often wonder where her strength comes from and how she maintains the fight.  Much of her strength comes from knowing that God provides her with the courage to keep going. The other half is just pure stubbornness and determination. I wish I had even a 3rd of her strength and courage.

After seeing the devastion of Japan's tsunami and being reminded constantly of our country's downward spiral, I find myself easliy drawn to the depression and anxiety like a magnet.  Just like the blackness from the tsumani enveloping Japan, so too, the depression creeps up on me like a monster, destroying everything in its path.

Regardless of who you are, battles in life are never ending.  Natural diasters like the tsunami and battles with health like cancer don't discriminate.  Jobs are lost and our loved ones pass on.  In an instant, lives can be changed and we are reminded that we are powerless.

During these trying times, I lean even more towards that Heavenly Power, remembering that He is still in control. Even though some days seem a bit trying, I can still have Hope knowing tough times do not last forever.  God still is and remains in Control even when our world seems out of control.

When I see what my friend is enduring, I can draw from her strength.  Being around positive and strong willed people influences me.   They brighten my mood and encourage hope.  I remind myself that anything is possible if it's God's will.  I continue to lean on that understanding and search out encouraging forces.

Not long ago, one of my friends shared with me about her aggravation at a McDonald's drive-thru.  The customer ahead of her was taking forever!  She and her daughter was growing angry and inpatient.  Finally their turn came and the cashier explained that her order was free.  The person ahead of her had just paid for their breakfast! Small things like that impact lives, our children, and reminds me how giving can be like a domino effect.  Regardless of whats going on, kindness and giving back brings hope back into our lives and others. It causes positive changes.

Through the struggles, I continue to remind myself of the blessings I do have. I enjoy giving back all that I can. Spending time with people, volunteering, and praying for a total stranger can make a huge difference in your mood. Like my friend, we have to be determined and stubborn to stay positive in a selfish world. We can make a difference in other people's lives.

Ways to Help:

• Volunteer or visit those in nursing homes and hospitals
• Buy a strangers lunch
• Help a neighbor
• American Red Cross
• ASPCA
• National Breast Cancer Foundation
• United Way

* May your World be brighter within regardless of your surroundings & situation. *

Weighing In by Liz Curtis Higgs

My friend Kirsten sent me this interesting article from Liz. This is something all of us women can relate to - weighing in on our appearance.  I look forward to reading more of Liz's books.

Weighing In

It's important to remember than God accepts us just as we are.  Seeking His Guidance for our lives should be more important that any diet or rules from society.  We are not conformed by what society tells us who we are but by who God Says we are.



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