Hope for a Life of Anxiety

Someone in your family driving you nuts?

It's all around you, it's ugliness.  The lies. The destruction. The torn lives. The control over you.  Addiction. For the majority of my life, I have seen the power that drugs and alcohol has over my loved ones. Growing up, I assumed it was a way of life as if everyone's family lived in the toxic, turnmoil, and anxiety; that everyone's grandpa or some member of their family drank until they couldn't see straight causing embarrassment and laughter.  SURPRISE! They don't! Not everyone lives that way. 

But living in Eastern KY, you might start to doubt there was family out there who didn't live this way.  You might even think that this is the WAY of Life and my loved one will never change.  Countless times we have had our hearts broken, been manipulated {Again, and again, and again...}, and have tried tirelessly to change someone who Refuses to change or get help.  Time after time we question why. Why? Why won't they change? Why do the treat me this way?  Why don't they just straighten up?

Bottom Line - Why should they?

We are so focused on changing them...our family.  Naturally.  They hurt us and their selves.  However, trying to change someone is like banging your head against the wall trying to make a door. It's not going to happen.  Believe me, I have lived my whole life this way until about year or so ago! It's up to you to change. Change how you react and change your behavior. How?

STOP!!!

• Stop the nagging and threatening 
• Stop giving money and any other material things
• Stop saving them and rescuing them
• Start saying no and setting boundaries 
• Take care of you and what is important to you
• PUT God first and not the individual

There can be Peace and you deserve it. It seems impossible....scary....and pointless...and almost selfish.  Yet change has to happen before the peace can happen.  Change can start very, very, small by telling yourself each day you are lovable and deserve happiness. Don't beat yourself up for giving in or feeling like a failure. Change takes time. Loving and taking care of you BEFORE trying to take care of your family - especially the chaotic one - sounds so selfish and against what we were taught.  Guess what? Have you thought about the person you are rescuing and the selfish lifestyle they are living? Not enabling the addict can save their life.

Of course, I could write an entire book on rescuing, trying to change someone, and tough love.  Thankfully I don't have to and am still learning myself.  

Did you know there are support groups that deal just with the families of addicts or who grew up in addictive homes? It's called Alanon. It's free, safe, and confidential for people to vent, scream, cry, laugh, and support each other when you feel you're in this situation alone.  I started attending in '08 and was surprised that other people were nuts just like me! Wow!

I hope and pray for you and your family through these challenges.  Change can happen in Eastern KY or any home but it takes someone to change.  Check out a local meeting sometime -- there are a few close by.  See the Alanon website for more info.

INSANITY = Doing the same thing over and over and over YET EXPECTING a different result!!

Donation of Life

Would you give a donation for life?

I'm happy to announce that my uncle recently received a liver transplant at the wonderful St. Luke's in the Houston Medical Center.  He had been on the waiting list for about 7 months so when the call came, we were surprised and thankful. He had went through tedious amounts of tests, blood work, paper work, and other routines just to qualify. Though he was frightened and excited to trade in his old non-working ill liver for a newer one, he was thankful more than anything for the donation from the person who obviously no longer needed it and who was laid to rest.

Unfortunately, one of my younger cousins, Ronda, was involved in a tragic motorcycle accident back last year in Campton, KY.   Though she lost her own life, 3 lives were saved because she was an organ donor.  This is a true example on how God can change something so tragic into a wonderful blessing.

We rarely dwell or even like to think about death.  It's something we hope is an event that is way-way-far off! It can be a scary or depressing topic. On top of that, who even wants to think about what happens to our body parts after the fact? However, preparing for your death should be another item on your task list for life's ever occurring events.  Since death is an event that none of us can avoid, it's best to get prepared now instead of leaving the unhappy tasks to our grieving family members. 

There are so many people in America still on that ever long waiting list just hoping and dreaming for a donation of life.  Many still pass on without having the chance or being educated about donating to save a life. Growing up, I heard absurb horror stories about organ donation. Check out some of these organ donation myths. Yet organ donation can be the greatest gift you could ever give to someone....just ask my uncle! < -->
Become a donor at: http://www.organdonor.gov/ or call 1-888-ASK-HRSA.


Don't fear death for God created the cycle of Life.  He made a donation to you so it's your turn to make a donation of life.

Issues with Breathitt County Officials

Have you been robbed?

I really enjoyed writing my last blog entry, "Crossing Over". It gave me a chance to escape and hope for a brighter day.  Lately however, I have been far,  far away from that special Heaven place! :)  I have been dealing with my Mom's issues with getting the County to fix the public road -- Fugate's Fork Road.  If you lived in that area or in Breathitt County, I believe you would understand my dilemma with the county officials.

My mom and many of my family live on Fugate's Fork Road.  It's just a simple 2-3 mile county dirt road running up a holler on the side of the mountain. Don't let the name fool you - we, the Fugate Family do not necesarily own it!! It is maintained by the county which means THEY-- the county officials -- are responsible for maintaining the safety and conditions of the road. 

The Fugate's Fork Road is very dear to me since I walked it nearly everyday for six years to catch the school bus.  So to see the road ignored and damaged affects me personally.  Though I currently don't reside there, my friends and family do.  I have been hearing the struggles and disheartening of the Fugate's Fork residents for many months now.

The road on Fugate's Fork has never been in the best of shape, especially in the last year or so. Lately though, it has gone to the extreme.  The garbage has not been picked up THREE weeks,  my mom and others haven't received their mail nor is she or many other residents in that area able to safely leave Fugate's Fork.  My family has spent countless hours notifiying the County Judge, the magistrate of the area, the County Garage, and even the disctrict representatives.  Yet they are blately being ignored by the County and District Representatives. Time after time after time their requests have been ignored, excused, or even thrown into the trash.  Which makes me wonder how robbed they really are? Why is that these officials able to get elected into office? What's even more surprising is that these officials are running for office in the next election? One official even made a comment that he would fix the road if my family voted for him!

Are you like me? Do you find this issue astounding or appalling? How many times have you heard of votes being bought or bribbed? When I was younger, I thought it was neat that you could get money for voting for someone.  My grandpa was drunk and had lots of money on every election day...guess where he got it?

Now that I am older, I get angry at the thought of uncaring officials robbing poor people and taking advantage of people.  They care only for themselves.

I have contacted several state officials and will continue to contact and fight for Fugate's Fork.  I need your help though---prayers, suggestions, --and ---NO...I not your money! :)  Contact the KY's State Governor, the Attorney General, the Election Fraud Department, the Secretary of State, Lieutant Governor, and any other media contacts that you might have.  Email anyone and everyone you know about this....

Doing this alone is a struggle.....but having friends fight with you makes it better.  I am not afraid for the Lord Lights My Way.

Peace....and Thanks.....BTW - Can you bail me out if you see me in the Breathitt County Jail?? :) LOL

IT's Illegal for Someone to Buy or Bribe Your Vote.  YOUR VOTE DOES COUNT.  YOUR VOICE MATTERS!!!