One more day...

If I had just one more day to share with you, I'd give up almost anything to be by your side.
Just one more hour to hold your hand,
One more minute to tell you how much you mean to me.
One more second to see the sparkle in your eye.

If I had just one more day to be with you, I'd let go of my fears and anguish.
Just one more hour to grab another story from you.
One more minute to hear your laughter.
One more second to see you smile.

If I had just one more day to be with you, how grateful I'd truly feel.
Just one more hour to gain a bit of wisdom from you.
One more minute to let you know I care.
One more second to share an everlasting embrace.

The days are fleeting fast before me like a blink of an eye.
As time waits for no one to say their last goodbyes.
He leads them to that other side where we cannot see
We cannot reach, we cannot be until He's called us there.

For now, I will remain thankful for that last moment,
That last laughter, that last bit of happy life we use to share,
Knowing we will get that one more day, one more hour,
in the place where time stands still forever more.
~ Crystal Fugate (5/16/2011)

There is never enough time to say goodbye or prepare us for the loss of those who mean so much to us.  Every day should be a new beginning with those we care about.  Take advantage of the moment, the feeling to say, to be, and to live for today. We never know what tomorrow may bring nor can we see God's expiration dates on our lives. Yet we can be grateful for every hour and every second we share with one another.

Experience Today!

Take It Easy...

These past few weeks have been really stressful for me. Losing a close friend, struggling with classes and work,  the worries of world and trying to keep up with other personal stuff in my life has brought me back to that place full of anxiety.  It's that place where I try to carry everything upon my shoulders while pushing God aside.  With so much going on in our society, I make up in my mind that He doesn't have time for me.  I assume my needy little prayers are so insignificant compared to the issues of others.

This is exactly how I felt today! :^) 
My mom with her grandpa,
Wayne Back (Bach). It's great to know God's
there when we cry like babies!

After sniffling over my troubles this morning, I remembered my handy little chart posted by my desk.  My chart has a list of those negative remarks that so often pop in my head.  I also have scripture and positive reinforcements listed against those negative remarks.  My favorite this morning was Hewbrews 13:5 which states I will never leave you nor forsake you.  Regardless of the troubles of the world, God has promised to always be there even when others disapppoint us or are not there.  He comforts us when we are scared, unsure of life, and even frightened of answered prayers.

A few weeks ago my cousin Teresa shared with me of photos of my mom from years ago hanging with her cousins, Charles, John, and Bob Fugate. How simple life seemed to be as a child with no responsibilities. Yet everyone seems to have struggles and responsibilities.  Wouldn't it be nice to just chill out in the wagon and let God pull it for awhile?

My mom hanging with her cousins,
Charles, John, and Bob Fugate



Blogging my struggles and getting refocused in His Word reminded me of chilling in that wagon.  The worries of my finals, family, friends, and the weight of the world is now in His Hands to carry. He can do a better job than I can.  :^) God Bless!

May your worries and struggles be lifted into His Hands.

Happy Mom's Day to My Mommy,

Patricia Colleen Fugate!

Heartbreak

Remembering a Great Friend - Thad Tranbarger
On Friday morning (4/15/11) I received the shocking news that my good friend & co-worker, Thad Tranbarger had passed away from a massive heart attack the night before.  For a moment I thought it was a joke as Thad always brought his goofiness and laughter to work. I was devastated and heart broken when I realized the truth. We had worked together for 7 years.  What's weird is that we were just goofing off the day before and he seemed just fine. He was only 47 years old and had gotten back on track of eating healthy.  How could this happen? I was and am still in a bit of a shock.

I remember that Thursday I asked his advice (as usual) on my degree plans.  His advice was to get a degree in what I loved the most regardless of the pay.  He said he wanted to be a chef! He always encouraged me to go for what I loved the most no matter what - to live life to the fullest; to never regret and take time to really enjoy life. Even though I never met his wife, he had such joy when he talked about their relationship.  I admired that they did so many things together. He provided her with so much support and loved spending time with his granddaughters. I can't imagine their little hearts breaking.



Thad's joke backfired on him on this day! LOL



Going through this loss reminds me of a little of losing my Grandma Jean and Dad all over again.  Thad had a quality similar to theirs.  He brought sunshine and laughter into our office and always had a positive outlook about life. Thad was like having a big brother at work. He loved to joke around but help people out at the same time.

Coming to work, a strange emptiness surrounds us now.  You struggle to be strong and deal with the pain, to move on. But we are not robots and we have emotions.  For some, it's easy to share feelings while others tuck their emotions away to hid the pain, to be stronger.  For me, remembering his joy and his laughter helps ease the pain.



This was our nut ball - Thad!
He would kill me for posting this!



This is life....full of new beginnings and losses.  What I hope to learn from this loss is to not be afraid of Life or Death. To take Thad's advice and live life - to enjoy every moment, every person, every pain, every joy, and yes, even sorrow, for God has the Plan, not us. All He asks is for us to Trust and Believe in Him and His Plan.

Enjoy this Moment as if it were your last....

We Love & Miss You, Thad. PCS will never ever be the same :^(