Superhero Daddy

I came across a plaque the other day that read, “Anyone can be a Father, but it takes a special person to be a Daddy”.  I began to wonder, do most kids think their dad is a superhero?

For us daughters, our dad IS our Superhero. He seems to be able to do anything. He works hard, seems so smart, rarely gets sick, and is a charmer to everyone he meets. His smile and laughter can light up the room while making your heart jump with glee at times. 

Our dad is the first man in our life who showed us his silly side and comforted us when we were scared. He gets us moving when we don’t feel like going on. If something’s broken, he can fix it. If you need money, he always seems to have some. If you have a question, he will search out the answers. He can be a navigator when we seem lost. He can be a storyteller, a cook, and even a counselor. He might not say a word but just knowing he’s there can help us feel comforted and safe.

He may not be perfect but that’s ok. His brilliant love seems to overshadow all the mistakes he has ever made. He’s our father, more than that, he’s our Daddy.


Ted with his daughters, Nikki and Shannon.
We love and miss you dearly, Cowboy! :-(



Recently, a dear friend to my family and I, Ted O’Daniel, passed away after battling a courageous fight with throat cancer. We comforted the family the best we knew how in the days leading up to his death. Regardless of how long we have been “expecting” the end, the passing is never easy.

I tried to stay strong during the memorial service until I hugged his daughters, Shannon and Nikki. Flashes of losing my own dad flooded my heart. I know their pain all too well. Even though we all go through our own “experiences”, we cannot prepare someone or feel the same pain that they are going through. Yet we can hold their hand and let them know that they are not alone in this journey.

Ted was indeed a charmer. Always smiling, he was a regular prankster with my uncles, John and Dwayne. They were indeed his BFF’s. I can’t imagine not seeing him with them nor can IHOP. They were regular flirts during their many “coffee meetings” there. He could tell a joke without cracking a smile and I would take him literally. LOL

Many of Ted’s attributes reminded me of my own dad, strong-willed, risk taker, and a hard worker. His positive outlook on life helped him in battling cancer. His daughters meant the world to him. I envied their closeness which made me wish I had lived nearer to my dad. Yet he was nearby the evening I found out my dad was pretty sick and had comforting words to share.

Life seems odd when someone passes. No longer can we just call them up to say hello. The sound of their voice slowly fades but the memories seem to get stronger. Their absent is inevitable during the holidays.

What has comforted me is in the knowing that they are not truly “gone”. Although we can’t see them physically, we can feel their presence and their spirit when we relive their smile and laughter. What’s even more assuring is that they will always be there to guide and comfort us when we need them the most.

Daddy is no longer with my physically now. But he has gone ahead of me to be that shinning light when the time comes for me to cross over. He now has truly has become my Superhero, only with wings instead of a cape.

Ted’s motto: We can CHOOSE to have a good day or a bad day.

Be a Voice

How far would you go to stand up for a cause or for your values? In today’s society, we are sometimes fearful of standing up for what we believe in or what is important to us. Authority voices tell us to hush up, don’t stir up controversy or push anyone’s “buttons”. We are being shoved to just go along with what society “tells” us to do like mindless robots. Can you imagine what our world would be like if our history had just “went” along and not pushed buttons?

The United States was founded on causing a stir. This is how America came to be. Our ancestors came afar looking for a new beginning. They fought to establish a new land where they could entrust their values and beliefs. Imagine if our ancestors never took the initiative to fight. What would our world look like?

Can you imagine if no Civil Rights Movement ever happened? We would still be living in a nation where African Americans are unequal, can’t vote, or have much choice at improving their lives. How different our leadership and society would be.

Can you imagine if the women’s rights movement never happened and women never had a voice? In many countries today woman still don’t have a voice. A recent article described a young teen who committed suicide because she was forced to marry her rapist. (http://news.yahoo.com/outrage-over-suicide-moroccan-teen-forced-marry-rapist-171033094.html) We can look at this and other stories and feel outraged. However, for other countries, this may be the norm. Their culture represents an outlook and attitude entirely different from our world.

So what does it take to fuel the fire and be a voice for our beliefs? Perhaps a little courage, faith, and taking the initiative is all we need to start a movement. We can sit and plan for things for years yet nothing will get done. We can plan for the storms and joys of life but nothing will impact or move our hearts until the storm hits or the joy arrives. Standing up, taking the initiative, and moving is the key.

I recently heard about the Back to Life organization, founded by Laura Zavala Alfred. Back to Life is a young women’s movement “fashioned to awaken America’s conscience to the injustices of abortion”.

On March 17th, 2012, 39 young women will embark on a walk, please read carefully, WALK, from Houston to Dallas (300 miles) to support Pro-Life! Why this long journey you may ask? In 1972, the Dallas Courthouse was the birthplace of Roe vs. Wade case which legalized abortion.  Houston has the nation’s largest Planned Parenthood Center. These young women all have stories of how abortion has affected their lives. Some are survivors who were supposed to be aborted; others have committed abortion while there are others who just want to take stand. Regardless of their story, they all represent different cultures and different religions, but all believe in the Power of Life.  These women want to represent the Voices for the unborn. 

We all have different viewpoints and opinions, that’s the wonderful thing about America. We currently have the freedom to stand up for our beliefs and be a voice for future generations.

Don’t let your voice be robbed. Have the Courage to Speak Up!

A Haven of Hope

Helpless and shocked. Those were the only words to describe what I felt when seeing the devastation in West Liberty, KY.  While I was relieved that my family, friends, and my hometown were sparred from the tornado's raging path, the sorrow and powerlessness is still there.  

So many times we hear of towns and families being ripped apart by the violent tornadoes.  Yet our hearts aren't as touched until devastation really hits close to home.  Until we have experienced similar losses, it can be hard to connect to someone going through a tragedy. There are no magic words to say to someone who's lost a child, a home, or who's been given a death sentence. It's in those moments where saying "Sorry" seems so shallow.  Words just don't seem to be enough. 

 

The night the tornadoes hit KY, I was visiting a friend who's been fighting throat cancer for past few years. He's now at home in hospice care.  He was having a good day, alert and in good spirits with his daughters nearby.  We joked around, pretending that things were normal, but there's a sting in our hearts knowing his days are now numbered.  The visit reminded me so much of the last days I spent with my dad.  I had a tinge of hope back then that my dad would walk out of the hospice care with a miracle from God.  Like being in the middle of a tornado, we are surviving each passing moment, holding on to what's dear to us.  I clung on and cherished every second with my dad just as my friend's daughter is now doing.  She questioned my experience with my dad's last days, as the heartbreaking memories flooded my mind.  What comfort could I bring her when the pain still lingers there?

Getting on with life after my dad's passing has been the hardest part.  Feeling the emptiness from what once was or imagining what could have been only prolongs the pain.  Yet somehow we struggle through to where we accept the loss and take a step forward.

As I sifted through those pictures of the ruins of West Liberty on the East KY Media site, one stood out the most, a sign that read "A Haven of Hope".  After all the destruction, where the monster storm threw around trucks like matchboxes, crushed brick buildings, and wrapped metal around trees like ribbons, a symbol of God's mercy remained.  Regardless of where or how the sign came to be, its message of Hope is what this town needs.

Sometimes we can't imagine life after a heartbreak but life does continue.  I have heard and sang that "Amazing Grace" song so many times without reflecting on the words.  Still when I hear the song, my heart is brought back to my Appalachian roots. Suddenly I am comforted and reminded of a safe place.  We may be broken down, have lost our way, living with struggles of pain, but God provides us with the grace and protection we need.  It is through our destruction and heartbreak that our eyes are opened.  God can't heal or build something new without first tearing down the old.  It is in this destruction that we can hope for the positive changes to come into our lives.  Oddly, destruction can bring us together as we reach out to others.  We have lost a sense of control and are at the mercy of God.  Our losses causes us to trust in God, our haven of hope.

 West Liberty - A Haven of Hope

 

May God bless West Liberty and the other places that were affected by this tragedy. Today is a new day to be grateful for our past and our future.

Ways to help:

• Salvation Army

• Red Cross

• Christian Appalachian Project

• Donations (KSP)

God will provide all your Needs.